Three Months

I don't feel much different to the two month mark, but on reflection I am managing more without getting so worn out. I had a bad cold last week which totally wiped me out for nearly a week, so I was frustrated because I couldn't summon the energy to do my rehab.

Today I did the grocery shopping on my own at Pack n Save (for those of you overseas, it's the busyest supermarket) which was a big deal. The trolleys are really big and hard to push and manuver, and the people around get in the way so you have to move around them, stop in a hurry, etc. The checkout was hard getting all the stuff on to the conveyer from the trolley, but the rest was easy. I left a lot of it in the car, and packed it into lots of small boxes so I could carry them. By the time I got home I was quite sore, but not too bad.

I've hardly taken any drugs for months now, the only time I had to take anything serious was a couple of weeks ago when I went to the Lantern Festival and there were big crowds so I was twisting through, and getting pushed about a little bit, plus lots of walking. I had to drive to and fro, and by the time I got home I had to tuck in to the morphine... first time since the very first days that I was home. That was a one off though, and in hindsight a bit dumb. I was just so excited and feeling so good!

The hardest thing is that I am struggling to cope with the day to day things, and do my rehab. I'm priorotising rehab over things like washing, but it is really hard to live in a mess. Bryan is really busy at work trying to recoup the money he lost looking after me all summer, so it's not his fault. It's just quite hard to keep up with stuff, so the standards are not as high as we would like. I get some help, but sometimes when I ask it all seems too much trouble for the helper. Bryan's mum has been really good, she has done more than her fair share of ironing!

I am sitting for longer periods up in the normal chair, so I am starting to get into the books again. Plus, the motivation is coming back at last.

Out of all this experience, I have decided to start up a website for people in NZ with scoliosis, as there is nothing! I don't really know how to start, but I'm sure with my connections I'll get there!

Just over two months now

Well, after rocketing through the early stages of recovery, it's been slowing down slightly lately. I guess the long-term bone healing and fine tuning of muscles is slower. I have noticed that if I do too much in the pool, I get quite sore. It's a fine balance between doing nothing, and doing too much. I don't know at the time if I've done too much, but that night I'll be quite sore.

I have been feeling really tired lately, but otherwise good. I haven't been able to get back into uni stuff, but have been trying to. My concentration just isn't there, and Bryan has been noticing that I am doing some dumb stuff... just not thinking, so I guess it's probably for the best that I don't try anything too taxing because I might have to fix it later!

I'm doing 30min walking in the water at the moment, and 6 lengths of the kickboard (which does stir things up a bit). The lifeguard at the pool knows me, and thinks I'm some weird walking frankenstein because he asked what the scar on my back was from! It was nice though to have someone say that it was amazing what I went through, because it was. My surgeon hadn't done a revision before, to this extent. He had no expectations of what kind of correction he would get, rather had just hoped to stop it from getting worse. So I'm really lucky to have the good results that I did.

Here is a 2007 post-op pic, it's not the best as it only shows 3/4 of the length of the rods they put in. It's hard to tell what you're looking at, but trust me, it's straighter!

Six-Weeks Post-op

I went back to my surgeon today to have my first post-op check-up. This was a fun exercise involving more x-rays, - my stack is already too big to lug easily. I was feeling a bit sad on the way in, because it is very nerve-wracking to have to go to the surgeon and find out what he has to say, and to have to go through this on a regular basis isn't great. But today it was all good news. I told him when I came off all my drugs, that I have been driving, and what I have been up to, and he was amazed. I also told him that the most persistant pain site I had seems to be gone since the surgery, and he was pleased. He wasn't convinced that the surgery would do anything other than stop the curve from getting worse. So the reduction in pain, straighter spine, and smooth surgery was as much a surprise for me as it was for him. Having said that, my surgeon is known for having a very conservative outlook, and rare smiles. So I was pleased that when I said I was thrilled with the results, he actually looked like he was happy! I also haven't had any pain from my bone graft site, which has been really good. I had been told by many people how painful it is long-term, and I was afraid of having more pain than I already had. I think it is amazing how good I feel six-weeks out, and my surgeon was really surprised at how well I have recovered. For me, most of the time I feel better than I did pre-op. I am really tired though at the moment, and I do have some pain. But I am managing, and it is only sometimes where it is bad enough to make me drop everything and lie down.

I am finding it frustrating still not being able to do everything that I would normally, especially since Bryan still has to do all the housework plus try and catch up on his work. Because we went on our summer holiday for 2 weeks before my surgery, and him having to look after me full time since december, he is really behind. Also one of his staff has taken an extended holiday, so it's been really difficult. I really wish I could help more, and if I need stuff done it is adding to his workload. So all this time I have to think up ideas and scheme, is quite stressful for him! I need to bite my tounge when I think, 'hey, why don't we just do x y z to the house?' If anyone is feeling generous, I would love some help organising my office.

Our kitten arrives in two days, and we've narrowed names down to 1) Orion 2) Darwin 3) Leo, I think it's going to be Orion, but we are still undecided. Anyone who wants to vote can do so on my facebook page!

I'm hoping to be starting up thesis work soon, but I'm still feeling wiped out. There are lots of things that are small jobs that I could be doing, but don't have the energy. The days are going really fast, but I'm not sleeping well at the moment.

All up, I am so happy with how I've progressed to this point. The surgery was so major, but from all accounts I have done really well. It's been difficult at times, but nowhere near as bad as it could have been. I'm pleased that I have surprised my surgeon in a good way!

Five Weeks

My fifth post-op week has been a good one. I've managed to start driving again, and have been out for longer periods lately. I'm off all my drugs, but I get sore when I do too much. I've been for longer walks, but still get quite tired if I have to walk uphill. Just really unfit! I see my surgeon on tuesday, so I am hoping to get the all clear to start intensive physio. I also am hoping that all my fusion is solid, I really don't want to go through this again!

I've decided that I need to replace my car, I was having trouble prior to my surgery getting in and out. I've listed my car on trademe, and I've been looking for something with four doors and small. Something like a toyota echo, VW polo, or similar. I'm quite fussy though, and impulsive. This is a bad combination for car shopping, because when I see something I like, I want it right away.

We get our kitten next week which is exciting, still need to find a name for him! Any suggestions are welcome.

Four Weeks Post-op

Today is a bit of a milestone day, being four weeks since I had my big op. I am doing a little bit more each day, but mainly am still confined to my lazyboy chair. If I start doing things, people freak out and try to usher me back to a reclining position. Having said that, I have managed to convince Bryan on several occasions to take me out. I also have been on longer walks, which is nice.

I think it's time to step things up a little bit, as I haven't been walking everyday like I was at the start. I need to continue those things to make sure that I progress quickly, as I need to get my independence back. For the most part, my pain is less than what I experienced before surgery, but I am quite stiff and feel fragile. I'm not sure when I'm allowed to start bending again, but I don't feel like doing that yet. (Added later that day.... I think I spoke to soon about the pain, just went to Takapuna and had a look in some shops... really sore now, lasted out just over an hour, so I have a long way to go! I'm feeling positive that things will get better though, but as for being better than pre-op... well, only when I'm sitting around doing nothing!)

I'm looking forward to
1) driving
2)shopping
3) doing everything for myself
4) going for long drives
5) going for long walks
6) going away on the boat
7) swimming
8) starting pilates
9) going to the movies
10) going to some festivals, like the lantern festival in february

There are lots more things that I could add to the list, but those are the main things. I really miss exercising!

I think I'll be able to start my artwork soon, and start looking at some stuff to do with my thesis. I am really motivated to get going on my thesis, and start up at university again. I really feel like this year is going to be positive, and I'm hoping that my lack of pain now is an indication of how I'm going to be feeling from now on. I can't believe what I had to put up with, and how much Bryan has had to deal with stuff he really shouldn't.

Breaking out into the real world

Today I went on another outing, this one for an hour. I hopped into the car with Bryan, not exactly knowing where we were going... and suggested we head to Milford. We went to a cafe at the mall, and had to queue for a long time for a coffee in a small space. I was a bit nervous as the waitress kept sort of pushing past people to get through, and there wasn't really anywhere to go. Bryan stood quite close so that I would be sheilded from being bumped. After coffee, we headed to the stationary shop for some refil pages for my photo albums. I spent all of yesterday organising my photos from this year and last year, and ordered 160 photos. Weirdly, the photo album pages are going to be way more expensive than the photos.

Physically I'm feeling much better, I lasted an hour out today, and hadn't taken any pain relief today or yesterday (other than an anti-inflamitory). It's been feeling better than much of the time pre-op, which is something! If 3 weeks post op I'm in less pain than I had been, it's pretty telling of how bad it had been. I walked to the dairy yesterday unattended, after putting my foot down. I am finding it difficult being followed around everywhere like some fragile thing that might suddenly swoon. I guess that's a good thing! I have realised how independent I am.

The challenge is finding things to keep me occupied.